October 15, 2009

Reno Meltdowns, Breakdowns? Whatever...

Since posting about the state of our backyard the other day I have received a couple of comments in regards to how well I'm doing with it all. I thought I should put things right and let the world know that I'm not actually doing that well with it. As we approach 4.5 years of this, things are definitely better, however! I will admit that. God has taught me A LOT over this 4.5 years of mess and home improvements and differing ideas about our home. However, for the record I don't want people to have this misconception that Karina goes along with these activities and it's all terrific all of the time.

When we first began, I had what I would call "reno breakdowns" every couple of months. I would randomly burst into tears or start hollering about all the mess that was seemingly everywhere in my house. I remember one time in particular where he moved our hot water tank upstairs and had to have the electrical cord going down the stairs to have it plugged in. I couldn't understand why it had to be moved at all! And I lost it. Poor Rob. Or another time, early in, where Rob started bashing holes in the ceiling in both bedrooms upstairs---I couldn't understand why my house was being destroyed!! Every room! Even though we weren't necessarily fixing up those rooms yet. My personality is such, that my mental well-being seems to be largely effected by the state of my living quarters. If it's messy or disorganized, my mind feels messy or disorganized. Fortunately, after 4.5 years, 3 pregnancies, and many humbling experiences... these have become rarer around here. Through it all I wondered what God was trying to teach me. I think I am getting more and more glimpses of His plan.

Things I have had to give up or adjust to:
A perfectly organized house where everything has a place
The idea that I will have cupboard doors in my bathroom and kitchen
A nice manicured yard with a garden
Tools in the dining room constantly
No window frames
No baseboards
Drywall dust
Projects being started and not finished when I think they should
Unfinished projects staring us in the face

This is just a few things. But it's okay. I am learning well that our home does not have to be this fancy, put together place in order for it to feel like home. We will bring our 3rd baby home here, we have watched 2 of our children learn how to walk amongst the renovations, I have nursed my babies in the midst of insulation and drywalling, we have gone to bed hearing the scurrying of mice due to little openings in our walls, memories have been made! And guess what?! If the Lord takes us away overseas, a whole new adventure will begin!

May the Lord be using your circumstances--whatever they are--to shape you for His Purposes and not your own.

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