June 6, 2007

To answer your question...

Q. So if your husband makes a bad decision, is it the wife's place to advise him of making a different decision or is it the wife's place to sit quietly by and suffer the consequences with the man?

An excellent question! First, above everything else, go to the scripture and discover your role as your husband’s wife. Nowhere do we find instruction to instruct our husband or give him advice without him asking for it first. This question prompted me to quote from one of my favorite books from Debi Pearl, “Created To Be His Help-Meet”:

God made you to be a helper to your husband so you can bolster him, making him more productive and efficient at whatever he chooses to do. You are not on the board of directors with an equal vote. You have no authority to set the agenda. But if he can trust you, he will make you his closest advisor, his confidente, his press, secretary, his head of state, his vice-president, his ambassador, his public relations expert, maybe even his speech writer – all at his discretion. A perfect helper is one who does not require a list of chores, as would a child. Her readiness to please motivates her to look around and see the things she knows her husband would like to see done. She would not use lame excuses to avoid these jobs. A man would know he had a fine woman if she were this kind of helper. Such a blessed husband would receive honor from other men as they admire and praise his handy wife. “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband” (Proverbs 12:4). It is our job to learn how we can help our husbands in every way possible.

1 Peter 3:6B says "do what is right and do not give way to fear," meaning, we are to obey God's role for us as women and trust Him when our husbands make a bad choice. God has given us the answer to that very situation. He knew that our husband wouldn't always make the right decision or lead us down the perfect path everytime. But we are to trust God and not fear! God will stand by us when we stand by our man.

I hope this answers your question. :)

1 comment:

shannon said...

It's so nice to read a blog that encourages women to build up their men, not criticizing them or calling them stupid. We women are in for trouble when we make ourselves the critique of our men. That is not our job and just destroys relationship.
Proverbs 14:1 says it well:
"A wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down."