H - Hierarchy

Hierarchy: Appreciate His Desire to Protect and Provide

This is another desire God built into the good-willed man: the desire to protect and provide, and even die for, his family. Hierarchy may sound chauvanistic to some, but the Biblical definition of a man's responsibility is far from it. Ephesians 5:22-24 says "Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church. He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything." God hasn't given husbands some dominating, dicatorship over their wives, but a tremendous responsibility.

One quote that really stuck out at me in this chapter was: "The problem many women have today--including Christian wives--is that they want to be treated like a princess, but deep down they resist treating their husbands like the king. They aren't willing to recognzie that in the depth of his very soul a husband wants to be the one who provides and protects--he wants to be an umbrella of protection who would willingly die for his wife if need be."

Because of this deep seeded desire to protect and provide for their wives, men are EXTREMELY sensitive to put-downs from their wives in this area of providing for their family. The fastest way a woman can deflate her husband, is to tell him to get a second job, or put-down his current one, or be sarcastic about his wage.

Your Husband Will Feel You Appreciate His Desire to Protect and Provide When:

• you verbalize your admiration of him for protecting you and being willing to die for you.
• you praise his commitment to provide for and protect you and the family (he needs to know you don't take this for granted)
• you empathize when he reveals his male mind-set about position, status, rank, or being one-up or one-down, particularly at work.
• you never, in word or body language, put down his job or how much he makes.
• you quietly and respectfully voice concerns about finances and try to offer solutions on where you might be able to cut spending.